Career changes

Thursday 7.55pm

I have been thinking about my career. After listing my key skills it seems that some of my best ones are not being used fully at the moment. Sleeping for instance is one thing I am pretty good at, along with eating, and also staring at people in a strange way. So having explored all the options my ideal job is - Cat. There will be a few difficulties to overcome first - the cats themselves for one have a bit of a closed shop here but I am up for the challenge and I am sure it is against the law to disciminate on the grounds that I am not actually a cat. And also when I mentioned the good news to my family, they were not as enthusiastic as I thought they should be. I think it is because I will be bringing home small dead animals instead of money. Oh, and there is another one - I am usually nice to small animals so killing and eating them might be a problem, although catfood does come in lots of different flavours. So I am now working on a plan. I know where I want to be and I know where I am now, so I just have to break down the journey into manageable steps. Yoga classes would be a good start, especially if I am going to have to lick my own bottom, but I have made a start by stopping what I am doing every now and then and looking around blankly with my tongue sticking out.

Yes . . . Peter the Cat, I can see it now.


Picture is Buffy, my new mentor and role model.