Morning stars

Tuesday 9pm

I get up before anybody else in the morning. Just now it is very dark and quite difficult to gather together the energy even to get out of bed, especially if I have to go to work that day. Sometimes it is only the nagging of the hungry cats that gets me moving. The last six months have been a difficult time for Nicola and myself but are finally improving. If we can only hold it together then I know it will all come right – our love for each other is certainly strong enough, but I feel talked out at the moment and really just want to go somewhere quiet and sit and not think and not talk. Sometimes the time for talking has passed and action is required, but that is not going to happen here and it frustrates me and that upsets the people around me. Anyway once I finally stagger into the kitchen and peer through my sore eyes outside at the coming dawn I see a beautiful encouraging sight. Two stars, one bright and white the other dull red. I think they might be planets – Venus and Mars.

I don’t know what it is about celestial things but I find them so calming and optimistic, there is more to life than my problems and so much to be grateful for, a new dawn for me I think.